Monday, December 7, 2015

HE BORE THE BITTER SO I COULD TASTE THE SWEET


                                                  



During this time of year, my mind continues to race constantly like a movie camera reel due to the holidays. Many doctrines that I was raised with as a Jehovah Witness seem to come to fruition for me during the holidays. For years, it seemed as when Nov 1st came until January 2nd, I would go into a seasonal depression ( per my doctor) although I  have came a LONG way , there just seems to be no escaping the memories , blogging has definitely  helped me  talk about issues but I don’t know if I will ever be brave enough to actually share them all but for today  my blog is about the CROSS.

As a child born and raised as a JW, you are taught early on , that the CROSS, is pagan. You will never find a cross hanging anywhere in a Kingdom Hall. As Jehovah’s Witnesses we were not allowed to have any crosses in our homes nor as ladies were we ever to wear any jewelry that was a cross or had a cross in it. I can remember meeting people in our knocking on doors ministry work, occasionally someone would answer their door and they may have a necklace around their neck or if we were invited inside their home, I can remember occasionally seeing homes decorated with crosses. What goes on in the mind of a 5, 10, 15, and 20 even a 25 year old girls mind when she would see a cross? As a very young child I can remember thinking “ oh my, these people are demonic , they are going to die at Armageddon because they have chosen Satan over Jehovah”  I was even scared of them, but as a I progressed in my teens, I still thought it was wrong for people to wear or have crosses BUT  I doubted they were demonic people , did I ever express those thoughts absolutely not , my parents would have had me before the committee of elders in heart beat thinking I was becoming an apostate early on in life.

As a Jehovah Witness child, I was taught to believe Christ did not die on a cross, he died on a TORTURE stake. A stake that sits upright. JW’s do not believe Jesus arms were outstretched and each hand nailed, they believe his hands were nailed upright above his head .If this was the case then only ONE nail would have been needed. After I was saved, I can remember re – reading this scripture in a new eye: John 20:25 says says,
"The other disciples therefore said unto him, 'We have seen the Lord. But he said to them, except I shall see in his hands the print of the nails, and put my finger into the print of the nails, and thrust my hand into his side, I will not believe.'" I had read this scripture many times... but I finally saw it with new eyes, the word hands and nails were plural , not singular, meaning that Jesus had to have died on a CROSS. WOW! Actually , when you do research , the cross was used as a form of execution purposes , the two thieves who hung beside Jesus were also hung on crosses right beside him but JW’s believe the ‘cross’ is a pagan ( demonic ) symbol , it holds no value . Quite honestly, whether cross or stake, which I do firmly believe it was a cross, the most important thing is recognizing the blood he shed for you... for me.

We never used the term cross, even as child remember the old cliché  “Cross my heart “ well, we were never allowed to say such words.

Looking back, I firmly believe that Christ protected my heart as a child. He knew my circumstances and knew I could not--- nor would not be a rebellious child to my parents nor the religion , what I believe is he started showing me grace and mercy very young , he started tugging at my heart , that is why the doubts set in so young for me. It is through his mercy he allowed me to grow up and be an adult so I could make my own choice of whether I would follow him to the cross.

When my husband and I married 17 years ago, I remember a few times my parents wanted to come from TN to MD to visit their grandsons, my husband Mark before we had gotten married and had bought a beautiful cross that he had hanging in his home, now our home ( The picture below is of the cross he had hanging with our son Devon) , but before my parents would arrive I would always take the cross down. My husband mark didn’t say anything to me the 1st time, nor the 2nd visit they made to our home but by the 3rd visit he said that’s ENOUGH THE CROSS STAYS HANGING... if your parents don’t like it they can leave...Oh my what was I to do, being a 30 plus old woman scared to death that my parents were going to see I have a cross hanging in my house, seriously I was scared of what.. My parent’s rejection, the shunning.
                                  


                                                               
I was just thinking as well, I have never owned a cross necklace... if anything I would want for Christmas on a material matter, I think it would be that, a cross necklace.
(Maybe one of my family members will read this  ...lol)


So today as I was cleaning, I did a double take of a cross that my husband bought last year ( picture below) I really hadn’t given this much thought until today... It made me think about what Jesus did for me with these two nails driven in his hands... HE BORE THE BITTER SO I COULD TASTE THE SWEET...
                                                       


                                               

2 comments:

  1. the epiphany I had was that the JWs would say that Jesus died on a stake and make it such an argument. what I finally came to the conclusion was "what difference does it make WHAT Jesus died on. The important thing is that HE DIED for us. And that by focusing on cross versus stake it totally takes away from the fact that HE DIED.

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    Replies
    1. I so agree.. I stake a cross, does it matter, the point is he dies for us

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